At times, poet Asim Shah speaks in praise of Adila Bakul that Adila used to write but she loves her husband Rafique Ajad so much that she gave up writing altogether for his sake. Asim speaks in a very engaging way about this sacrifice of Adila. Adila Bakul loves Rafique Ajad , but I see no reason in it to give up writing and I find no connection in love for the husband and giving up writing or the love getting any stronger as a result of this sacrifice.
Actually, men become very happy when they see women sacrificing. If a girl gives up fer paternal family anr relatives for her husband, the man becomes very happy. If a woman gives up singing just because her husband doesn’t like it, the husband appreciates it greatly.
If a girl is learning dancing or painting, the husband puts a full stop to all this after the marriage and boasts proudly that he doesn’t allow his wife to do such things. Poet Asim Shah has searched and found a very significantly weird connection between Adila’s giving up writing just because her husband writes, and the love between them growing deeper.
If a girl commits suicide for a boy, how much the boy may regret the death outwardly, inwardly he is not so unhappy with it. The boy would grow his income, his personality, and would keep growing in a thousand other aspects and the girl will gradually turn empty, lonely and dependent closing all the channels for growth and development of her talents and skill. The society looks very highly upon this one-sided sacrifice of women, because it has in its possession, a numbers of black laws that it uses to humiliate women and retard their growth according to time d situation. It has in its hands, rules and regulation of the ancient ages which are enough to inflict pain and torture on women, to create differentiation and disparities against women. It has almost such national rights in hand.
In Aparna Sen’s film PARAMA, busy with the routine life in her husband’s household, the girl named Parama forgets that once she used to play Sitar and recite poems. When a middle-aged Parama starts thinking of Sitar again she discovers that this desire of hers has already gathered junk over the years. If she ever steps out of giving medicine to her mother-in-law and helping her children in homework, the places are invariably New Market, Minu’s house or Sheela’s flat. Her husband also knows that Parama cannot go beyond this.
In fact, the movement of women is that much only. Though the husbands cannot ever be ready to restrict or limit their own movements. After giving dictation to the lady P.A., Parama’s husband invites her to dinner, the invitation, which is not restricted to eating food only, but also to feed on the body of the young lady secretary.
On the other hand, if Parama happens to fall in love with somebody else, the whole roof comes down on her head. If any other man touches her body, she becomes polluted. No woman has the freedom to love somebody beyond the marital bond because a woman’s desires are controlled by her husband only. …Aparna Sen has tried to tell through this film that a woman is not the property of her husband. She has an existence of her own also.
A boy hears a girl singing Ravindra Sangeet mellifluously and immediately falls in love with her. But when the boy proposes the girl, the first condition is that she would have to give up singing after marriage . Now the girl speaks about singing with a blush that, ‘I don’t sing outside now, only inside the house.’ Hence forward, she will sing in the ear of his husband and at last, she would stop altogether.
